Frozen Over by Tarrah Anders

Author:Tarrah Anders [Anders, Tarrah]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Unknown
Published: 2017-01-02T18:30:00+00:00

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

ALLISON

They say that if someone lets you walk away; they’re the ones who let you go. If that’s the truth, how come I saw so much inner turmoil in his eyes? How come he still randomly sends me text messages? And how come I know he’s watching me, yet not coming to me? He hasn’t let me go, and because of that a tiny part of me keeps holding onto him. Onto the thought that he will come to his senses and we can just pick up where we left off because he will realize that this other job isn’t anything like how he thinks it is.

It’s been a month since I walked out of his bedroom. It’s been a long month, full of Ben & Jerry’s and Netflix. The looming holidays are approaching and while I’m usually in a happy mood this time of year, all I want to do is sleep and hide away.

A week to Thanksgiving and my dad tells me that he does not want to do anything, so I set up to volunteer at Grace Cathedral instead.

I’m early to work the kitchen to prepare the meal then is taken to one of the Tenderloin locations in the city and instead walk inside the beautiful church. I’ve come to this place on occasion when I was younger, always mesmerized with the beauty and size of the place. Today though, I’m concentrating on the labyrinth gracing the floor before the pews.

I stand before the labyrinth, looking at the size of it as I feel a presence beside me.

“Do you know the meaning to the labyrinth here?” He asks in a deep voice that echoes off the walls.

“It’s a meditation of some sort.” I reply.

“Indeed, you quiet your mind and let the labyrinth guide you through the stages. You let your mind and body lead you with an open mind and open heart.” He says.

“Stages?” I question.

“Yes, my child. The purging of the distractions and thoughts to allow your mind to silence and you heart to open. The illumination, which is the center of the labyrinth that is your meditation and prayer to locate from within what you wish to receive and then the union which is the healing forces at work mending you back together, leaving the labyrinth, the same path out. For everyone it’s different, but for most it is whatever feels most natural.”

“I’ve never thought of it as such. I just think of it as peaceful.” I openly admit to him.

“For everyone it’s different.” He says as he walks away quietly.

I walked the labyrinth, leaving my mind open and stilling my running thoughts. By the time I was finished, I felt free and yet heavy with emotion. I never subscribed to the hippy dippy shit, but I will admit that walking the labyrinth helped me feel more light. I took a seat in one of the pews and as my shoulders started to shake, I let out a cry that had been needed for quite a number of days.

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